There is a better method which is not relying on anything, but relying on your own ability, relying on mindfulness

Question:  What is the meaning of saying condolences in Thailand: Duang Viññan, to the departed one. Does it mean wishing the citta to have a happy birth into good realm?

Than Ajahn:  A person has different reactions to another person who passed away, sometimes he feels. bad so he wants to ask forgiveness from the person who passed away, so he went to the coffin and say sorry for what he did, but practically I don’t think the person in the coffin heard what he was saying.

So if you want to say sorry, you should do it when the person is still alive. After he or she died then forget about it. The only thing you can do is to make merit and share the merit to the departed one. If the person is in the state where he needs the merits then he will be able to use the merit that you share, however if he has more merits than you, he will not need the merit you share. But we still do it, just in case he needs it, he can have the merits that we share for him. So it is a customary in Thai Buddhist practice that we share merits to the deceased.

Question:  When I meditated with my eyes open, my mind becomes calm easier compared to when I meditated with my eyes close. I look at an object and keep on thinking about it and I am able to stop thinking instantly. I find it hard to do it if I close my eyes. What is the reason for the different result when meditated with eyes close and eyes open?

Than Ajahn:  Each individual might have different reaction to different way of practice, so if this method makes you peaceful then it is okay to use it. But I think it is only partially peaceful state, you have not gone into full jhāna level, in which everything disappears including the body. In order for everything to disappear, you have to close your eyes because if you open your eyes, your mind still has contacts with the external things so the mind cannot enter into full concentration. If you want full concentration you have to close your eyes.

Question:  I find it effective (in developing calmness) using musical sound using my vocal cord because it lures my mind away from thinking. Can Ajahn clarify what is the reason for having good result using this method?

Than Ajahn:  It takes your mind away from thinking about other things that cause your mind to become restless, but this is a brief or shallow kind of stillness, you have not gone deep enough and you also rely on music and any time if you don’t have music then you won’t be able to make your mind calm, so this is not a good method.

There is a better method which is not relying on anything, but relying on your own ability, relying on mindfulness. It is better to use mindfulness to make your mind becomes peaceful and calm. However when you start, if you cannot do that yet, if you think you can use music or listen to Dhamma talk can help to calm your mind, you can do that, but once you can do that (be calm), you have to turn off the music, turn off the Dhamma talk and concentrate on your breath and keep on practising in this way, so that your mind can go deeper. 

By Ajaan Suchart Abhijāto