"To establish the attitude of loving-kindness—the genuine heart of mettā—is to establish within ourselves a heart of non-contention, a heart that is accepting and accommodating of all mind states. This doesn’t mean to say that we are approving of every thought we have, or that all our feelings of selfishness, violence, aggression, jealousy, and fear are beautiful, wonderful adornments for the world. We’re not trying to pretend or allow ourselves to get lost in delusion, confusing the skillful and unskillful. Instead we’re simply trying to recognize that everything belongs, whether it’s a noble and wholesome thought, or a selfish, fearful, jealous, or greedy thought. They all belong. They’re all attributes of nature. When we cultivate this quality of non-contention and acceptance toward all our inner qualities—feelings, thoughts, perceptions, memories, ideas, and fantasies—then the heart is not divided, and there’s unity, a unification of the heart. Without this fundamental unity of mettā in our hearts— this fundamental welcoming inclination and recognition that our internal attributes, good or bad, are all aspects of the natural order—it’s impossible to have a genuine, substantial attitude of loving-kindness toward others, because the heart is divided."
- Ajahn Amaro
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